Judgement

What I wonder is why people judge my life so much, they feel the need to weigh in on every decision, every phrase, every utterance.  I'm not interesting, please leave me alone.  If I was in fact cool and interesting I would do normal things better than everyone else or try to be absolutely the opposite of normal.  I do not.  So why does every action need to be judged.  Leave my decisions to me.  All your judgement achieves is for me to feel terrible about myself because everyone is laughing at me. There no longer on my side, your judgement just created a line in the sand, ended there empathy.  All your judgement does is make me want to put an imaginary cone of silence around my head to block out the thoughts of all those around me.  Your judgement is not going to make me change, all it achieves is making others think less of me.  It just makes my life harder.  It assassinates my character.  And it doesn't matter how hard I work, the actions I do to the contrary, you already assassinated my character, and peoples perceptions don't change very easily.  Even if I brought it up to you. And you apologized. The damage is done.  The trust I could have formed obliterated by your opinions.  By the shared trust you already possessed with the others.  My only redemption maybe being your new found compassion.  But I'm still at your mercy, I hate that, I would rather forgo the whole endeavor of meaning anything to these people if someone else is in control of my interactions.  Time to move on to other pastures. Because my heart won't take another judgmental assassination.