Thoughts Explosion

Its almost 3 in the morning and I can't really sleep, so many things rattling around in the brain.  What am I going to do? Where am I suppose to go? Should I go on summer missions? Can I even go? Thinking about 3 projects, running 3 projects, working on 3 projects.  So many strange feelings, feelings of repression, unable to say what I want to say.  Have the afters "Say It Now" in my head and can't get it out.  I feel so much is locked up in my heart.  I can't shake this feeling of being trapped by silence.  Wanting to speak my mind about philosophy, art, history, music, culture, sociology, video games, software design, international relations, politics, law, morality, psychology, sports, books, who I am, other people, it all feels trapped.  Its pounding in my head, all these thoughts intersecting and exploding off each other, understanding being lost to the spontaneous combustion of ideas.  Its maddening how many thoughts are fighting for my attention.  So many chains of ideas flowing together.  How is it that the world has come to this point? Information explosion, leading to a character implosion.  How to make sense of the rampant misinformation and pride that comes along with it.  Why are so many people so prideful?  How do I change it?  My life's purpose is to serve others, why can't I figure this out?  So many forces pushing and pulling at me! Holy Spirit Guide my path, lead me through my day to day.  What can I do to move forward? I feel stuck! My thoughts are creating a net, a web, blocking the truth of the God.  My mind is capturing everything right now, writing is helping slow down the thoughts.  I just want to be less aware of my world, its to much information for one person to handle.  To many people, to many differing thoughts, to many things to know and learn, to many things to try to reconcile to the Truth, if only I could just snap my fingers and expand my mind. I wish, I wish.